Friday, August 10, 2007
help
I don't know what to do right now. I just found out that i am accepted to begin seminary classes online beginning this November. I am starting a new job right now and getting married in December, however. The seminary students say that i will need to put in about 15 hours per week of studying to excel in my classes, but will that be possible if i am working on campus with students full time and becoming a husband a few weeks after classes begin? If some of you old married guys could give a little advice it would be much appreciated! I just don't know what to do. I want to start seminary asap, but would have to wait a year if i do not begin this fall. I know seminary and IV would conflict, especially with 3 road trips each month for InterVarsity. So i need to pray about this, but i'd like to hear what you all have to say!
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6 comments:
“When a man is newly married, he shall not go out with the army or be liable for any other public duty. He shall be free at home one year to be happy with his wife whom he has taken.”
-Deut 24:5
I echo Josh. A content wife is worth more than a seminary education. Psshhh...but of course I'm also going to say take a year off to reconsider the RCA seminary :-)
Sorry I'm, not an old married guy, but, Oi, but you worked so hard to achieve this announcement! Yes, you are head of the household. But what does your wife think? You might wait longer than a year to be re-accepted, if ever, to seminary. Where is your heart being called? Is it IV forever? What doors will seminary open that IV will close?
Just the mom
This is Kate, I'll have Jeremy give his two cents as well... he has far more wisdom I'm sure...but in your e-mail you said you wanted BOTH of our help. :) As a newly married woman, I know how important it is to work to develop your relationship on all levels- marriage is amazingly great...but it also takes work. Don't stretch yourself too thin.
We love you and will pray for seminary.
-Kate
This is Jeremy. Thats a tough one. I agree with what Josh said wholeheartedly, because that is one of the first verses that came to my head. One thing that is really important is to realize that your marriage is going to be your #1 ministry, while InterVarsity will be your #2. I have also seen you work hard at ministry and studying the last 3 years, and you have done well, so there is no doubt in my mind you could do InteVarsity and Seminary. However, marriage takes a lot of work, and you must put alot of work into that. So, to give my advice, I think that for you to be faithful to your wife with your time and your energy, you should put off seminary for a year. I know I am only working 40 hours per week, and I feel like a do not have enough time to work on my marriage. That is my initial thoughts. Call me so I can hear what you think about this my friend. I will definitely keep you in my prayers about this. Another piece of advice, you should start reading Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas. It might help you sort through this.
Plus, when will you ever find time to take your lovely bride out in the canoe and catch those walleyes you were just talking about? :)
I would say it's doable. Our first year of marriage involved: finishing our senior year of college, taking the Perspectives class at church, helping lead prayer ministry at church, leading a small group and raising support to go to East Asia. That was insane. Much easier before kids!!
However, I would agree w/ Jeremy that being there for your wife should be your #1 priority. Especially early in your marriage. Build a solid marriage and home before kids come and before your life gets too busy. I don't think you'll regret that!
Love you bro and thanks for asking for our advice!!
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